Day 23’s challenge is to write a letter to your parents. I’ve actually been putting this challenge off for a while. I even thought of not doing it at all.
Then I decided it might be cathartic. Still, short and sweet is probably the wisest course of action and I’m not really concerned if anyone reads this or not.
You are wonderful and fabulous and beautiful and kind and I couldn’t ask for any better. I try to tell you often how much I love you, how much I appreciate you, and how Blessed I am to have you in my life. I try, but I’m sure I still don’t do it enough!!
Thank you for everything you have ever done for me. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. And thank you for being the best grandmother any child could ever have. I know my babies love their Mimi more than the world!!
I don’t call you that much anymore. When I talk about you, I usually call you by your first name. Is that strange? I just want you to know that I realize life was not always bad with you. There were some good times and I’m sure you did the best you knew how. The truth is, it just wasn’t part of your genetic makeup to be good or to be faithful. It’s a failing that was apparently handed down through generations and I suppose, at least, you tried.
I was very angry with you for the longest time, but I’m past that now. Now I just pity you. You walked away from the only really decent people you could ever claim as your own. It’s sad that you verbally and emotionally abused your wife for all the years of your marriage and then left her because you needed someone more “worldly.” It’s a pity that you walked away from your daughters–your own flesh and blood. And that you let one of them back in your life, only to allow her to be treated as if she is unworthy of your praise. But it’s a crying shame that you turned your back on your grandchildren–That you made no effort to see them or spend time with them or keep the promises that you made to them.
It’s okay though. I warned them that you wouldn’t keep your promises. I learned that lesson years and years ago. It wasn’t a surprise to me. And I was sad for my children for a while. Then I realized how much better off they were. They didn’t have to grow up waiting for you to find all of their faults and point them out. I hear you still do that.
Now they are practically grown. They are all teenagers and they are AMAZING. Your grandsons rarely mention you. You granddaughter never really knew you. They are okay for that. They are funny and smart and kind and beautiful. They work so hard and dream so big. You might or might not have been proud of them. But I am. I love them with my whole heart and know that being a parent is the most important thing I’ve ever done. I learned that from my Mother.
I hope you finally find whatever it is you’re looking for.