Sometimes that little green-eyed monster just rears its ugly head…
You Will Get Jealous. You will get jealous of the time spent away from you, of the time spent with people you might only know by name, of the vast number of people who command his attention, and the just as vast number of people who seem to believe they love him as much as you do. And if you are a woman who is married to a police officer, you will get jealous of other women. (I imagine it is the same for men who are married to police officers, but I don’t really know any, so I can’t say for sure!!)
My advice for this is to have friends, have hobbies, and spend time with other people you love. Don’t plan to exclude your officer from everything, but don’t plan everything around him/her either. As tempting as it is to put everything on hold for that other person, sometimes you just can’t. Be realistic–some things can’t be helped and it’s not fair to blame them when they get called in to work or they get phone calls or e-mails that must be answered.
Ask questions. Be interested in who people are and what their connection is to your spouse. All of those people who claim to just “love” your spouse, probably don’t. However, a few of them will be genuine and those kinds of people can make wonderful allies. Get to know the people your officer works with if you can. After all, you never know when you might make a friend or two!
As for being jealous of other women…don’t automatically be suspicious. But do be aware that “badge bunnies” are just as real as all the other types of skanks out there. Make your position known on all of these.
The most important thing to remember is that jealousy is never a positive emotion. The problem with jealousy, envy, and resentment is that they all have the power to hurt a lot of people–but you will usually be the one hurt most. Don’t let that happen. Recognize what you are feeling and then move on.
Part 6 can be found here!